EXCUSES

I woke up thinking today was Tuesday. Funny how Time flies especially when you’re doing nothing. Well it fells that way since I’ve fallen behind on the things I initially set out to do, and like every other thing I didn’t ever get to do, I somehow convinced myself that there is a good reason for that. A good reason, or a great excuse? I guess you will never know.

BUT I will, because no matter how hard I try, I cannot bring myself to lie to myself. (how many times can I use “myself” in a sentence?) I digress. You see how easily distracted I get, the network of rails that guide my train of thought must look something like;

one minute I.m hyper focused and a fly flies by and poof goes my focus! (do flies call us walks?)

you see what I’m saying?

I am a genius at coming up with reasons why I should leave the work I have to do now for later.

I am a genius at procrastinating.

I cannot hold myself to the same standards I hold other people.

I cannot keep a commitment I make to myself (focus Ali).

I am easily distracted.

And I take undeserved breaks in the name of self-care after doing the bare minimum.

I am a lazy Nigerian youth.

 

Like I mentioned in my last post, this excess time on my hands has inadvertently aided my procrastination. I can always do it later, I tell myself. There’s no need to hurry, you have no deadline to beat. You are your own boss (although I’m jobless),

See my unproductive life na. As much as I hate routine, I HAVE TO intentionally return to it and create a system for myself if I do want to accomplish my goals. Mind you, this is not the first time I’m making this sort of pledge to myself. Before leaving Home to this “foreign” land, I placed my right hand on my chest and made a similar pledge. Yet here I am, ironically like the guys we love to hate, after four years in office making the same promises; I will change.

Unlike those guys, even as I write it for the world to see, nobody can hold me accountable, but myself (hmm, just breathe Ali). I guess my shame might be greater if I disappoint, but if I can disappoint my parents, who TF are you? And that’s me doing it again. Making great excuses before I even begin.

It has not been easy so far, I must confess. Moving from a place of 20+ hours of electricity daily to a place of less than 2 hours, adapting hasn’t been easy at all. I’m not even going to talk about feeding or transportation and other expenses. I am beginning to learn to live with lesser than less. I find myself planning delicately before I make any move because, resources are minimal. It’s like I’m back in school again but this time around without the funds and support. I’m very lucky to have a great host who has been doing most of the heavy lifting for me.

At times like this when things are tight, I can stretch a thousand naira for a week and still have change to spare but as soon as I have small funds, once I break a thousand naira, it seems to disappear almost immediately.

The thought of getting a job has crossed my mind but as you know by now, I remain undefeated at coming up with the best excuses. 😀

There is something about going through hard times that seems to bring clarity of purpose and that is exactly what I need. I’ve been here a little over a week and it already feels like a month. I am exhausted physically even though I barely do any physical activity, but it’s not all bad. I can say for sure that my mind is in the right place. My mental health is getting better as I am in an environment that challenges my thought process. My confidence is growing too!

Speaking of physical activity, I will start working out henceforth. At least give myself a proper reason to be exhausted and maybe, just maybe not end up look like a starving refugee.

My Daily workout routine will consist of the following;

• A hundred push ups,
• A hundred sit ups,
• A hundred squats,
• A hundred dips,
• A hundred mountain climbers,
• 30 minutes of cardio, and
• 5 minutes of planks.

In no particular order, I die here!!!

Hopefully I don’t die sha… I’ll be posting updates on social media, mainly on my Instagram account, so be sure to follow me there.

This is I hope would help me manage my time better, cut down on making more excuses and eventually curtail my excesses.

 

Thank you for reading ♥

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